Year 3 of this audio discovery journey and the deep-throated learning has yet to be pierced by the blade of maturity. My stomach desires dolphin at the moment, so I type this with the wishes of death towards the water mammals. Something has been reoccurring in my slumber throughout my life that I can no longer suppress. It’s you, I have had dreams of you since before either you or I were born, and the closer we seem to be the harder it is to obtain sanity during my awake hours. Then again, the obvious answer here would be to suggest I am over thinking my feelings towards you, as always.
Dr. Agon is continuing to slaughter the thoughts of you in my dreams, so I am antsy when I message you and I don’t get an immediate reply. Last night he abused you in front of me and no matter how vigorously I attempted to break out of my barrier of low self esteem, I stayed placed, fearing your denial. Something is wrong with me, and I have yet to be diagnosed with zombiotious. Darth Maul is the only one who would understand me at this rate….
But fuck it, what do I know? My immaturity is feeding off of me to the point that not even an autistic child traces my thoughts. I need alone time, but not loneliness. Alone time with someone, a certain someone who’s name will remain nameless. I’m in a stalker position at the moment…. well if you consider that moment these past 3 months, sigh….